For example, normally, graduates would greet and shake hands with their faculty deans, but now that shaking hands is a Class D Felony, those faculty members decided instead to give you a virtual butt bump on TikTok.

例如，通常情况下， 毕业生会与他们的系主任打招呼并握手，但现在握手是 D 级重罪，那些教员们决定改为在 TikTok 上给你一个虚拟的屁股撞击。