Immanuel Kant says that in so far as our actions have moral worth, what confers moral worth is precisely our capacity to rise above self-interest and inclination and to act out of duty.

The most powerful thing we can do is rise above the situation and untangle our self-worth from the person we believe we need approval from.

We integrate our experience, and then the richer human being that we are goes into the new experience; again we give ourself and always by giving rise above the old self.